Life, as it goes.

If you read Harry Potter you know the meaning of Pensieve. Its the magical claudron in which Professor Dumbledore stores his memories. Non Harry Potter readers, consider it a peek into one of my pensive moods where memories roam unchartered and unchained.

This particular memory floated to the surface of my mind suddenly, a pleasant memory of that time of adolesence where the smallest of things seem epoch-making, when even an iota of attention from the other gender is made into a huge deal by giggling friends and when Shahrukh's poster on the wall gets a life of its own giving you the dimpled smile as you profusely believe and declare that what you feel for the peice of chart paper is actually love.

Yes... I did go through that phase, though I sometimes feel it was all a split-second dream. Anyway coming to the point, during a chat with my mother recently, she mentioned a name which brought this memory forth. The name belonged to a guy who is now married to mom's friends's daughter. Small world nahi but then Ahmedabad is a small city so this shouldn't really be a surprise.

It was the 10th standard exams. Board exams, made into a huge deal by teachers and parents alike. I had chosen the science stream due to an obstinate anger towards the subject of mathematics. I did not want to be a doctor or an engineer, my goal in taking 10th science was to once and for all show to myself and the world (as if it cared) that I could do maths. So after gruelling studies of the abstarct alphabets and arbit shapes, it was time for the exams. No other subject scared me as much as maths. Mom had given me the confidence and I had a good teacher both in school and tuitions but the fear remained.

The day of the maths paper dawned and papa dropped me to the exam center. Now, to give away the worst kept secret, in the school in which I was giving my exams copying was rampant. The understaffed education board could not fulfill the requirement of two observers per class, in some cases, rumours go that teachers would themselves come and write the solutions on the black board. Though I wasn't fortunate enough to have the teacher solving my paper, copying was still easy and common.

My neighbour was a light-eyed and fair complexioned boy named Harsh from St. Xaviers, he was cute and I had a tough time concentrating on my paper but had managed in the first two and had to in Maths as I had no patience to go through the damn subject all over again by failing. The guy in front of me was tall and very handsome. Even sitting he dwarfed me, his name was Shaun also from St. Xaviers. Next to him was a girl, Nili from Mt. Carmel, a sharp-featured, dark, Keralite. We had all become friends and discussed the papers before, during and after the exams.

Harsh was brilliant or so Shaun had told me and was obvious because his papers were amazingly neat and he asked for extra supplementaries in bulk. He hardly ever raised his head except to listen to our request for help or to place his answer sheets in a position that we could see them. Nili, Shaun and I were more or less in the same IQ band and were progressing through the exam echoing the song, "Saathi haath badhana."

The morning of the maths paper, Shaun was shivering with fear and nervousness, Nili's face had a stirken expression and she kept on twisting her fingers. I was furiously reading the stupid theorem written by someone who had too much free time on his hands. Harsh was the only one discussing with like-brained friends of his, the next day's paper.

The bell sounded and we reached our classes. I was feeling cold and my tummy was making noises like the Panvel local makes on the Mankurd bridge.

"Nervous." Harsh asked with a smile.
"Half-dead because of it." I replied truthfully.
"Don't worry. Let me know if there is a problem." He said.
"The whole damn thing is going to be full of problems." Shaun spoke in his husky voice and Nili giggled nervously at his pun but abruptly shut up as an observer entered the class.

My heart skipped several beats. The observer was a short, stocky man, dark as coal with bushy eyebrows and a broad forehead with such deep wrinkles that one would think that he was born with them. His voice was but a growl and he glared menacingly at the class.

"Safdar sir." a whisper reached me. "He is very strict. I don't think we can copy today."
"I am dead." I heard Shaun say. For once I was happy he was tall, his broad back covered most of my frame but the happiness was not going to last long.
"You." Safdar sir pointed to Shaun, move back. I can't see anyone behind you. "You girl. Shift to his seat." In quick strides he was standing next to me and I had to shift to Shaun's seat.

Harsh gave me a reassuring smile as I gathered my things and moved to Shaun's seat. Nili reached out a squeezed my hand.
"Saath mein jeena, saath mein marna." She whispered.

The bell rang and the observer distributed the papers. Black letters, meaning nothing swam across my eyes. I had no idea what the hell it was. Nothing made sense and I felt tears stinging my eyes. We heard a sniffle across the room, someone had broken down into tears. Looking back I feel the pressure was too much at that age. We didn't really deserve it.

"Do the arithmatic first." I faintly recalled my teacher's voice and I turned the page for the arithmatic section. Slowly, sense and sanity returned and I got busy. Supervisors came and went and after probably half an hour I noticed a lady enter the room. She was short and frail with a gait so slow, it seemed someone was pushing her at every step. As my eyes concentrated on her, I realised she was heavily pregnant. Nili and I exchanged glances both thought and hoped for the same thing. Nili quickly prayed crossing herself and God answered her request.

Safdar sir handed the supplementary papers to her and wordlessly walked out of the room. The lady adjusted herself on one of the empty benches and started pressing her ankles. The class relaxed, chairs squeaked and murmurs rose. It was time to get cracking on the paper.

"You ok?" Harsh asked me.
"Yup, just finishing arith." I replied.
"Gimme question 6." Shaun whispered, I shifted the paper a bit to the right and Shaun started copying.

Once I had got into momentum, things were much better. Confidence had returned. The teacher's instructions had been perfect. Finish arith, then geometry, tackle algebra in the end. Leave questions which you don't know, don't waste time on them. Things were progressing well, behind me Shaun was busy copying from Harsh and me. Nili was fine too and Harsh, well he had totally cracked it. The observer was too busy massaging her feet to bother about any of us. All around us students were busy helping each other. I am sure if an analysis is made of the entire class now, all papers would be identical.

The bell rang at half-time and I was on schedule. I started algebra with a little more than an hour to spare. Shaun touched my shoulder,

"Forgot the scale." he said.
"How are you doing?" I asked giving him the scale.
"Horrible. Harsh is not showing me enough." He cribbed.
"I have to finish mine too na." Harsh whispered.
"Harsh, algebra is bad. Don't know what to do with the 4th." I whispered.
"Its simple. They have combined two questions." He went on to explain as quickly as possible, I understood immediately and started writing furiously.
"Priya, if you don't help me I will fail." Shaun's voice had an edge.
"Which questions do you want?" I asked.
"All except 6th, 7th and 8th." he said.
"Ok." I slipped the paper to the side again.

Nili also started copying the questions she didn't know from me. At the 30 minute to end bell, I was behind schedule, it was difficult to write with half the paper towards the right and Shaun prodding me to move it further or write bigger. Three algebra questions were left. I could feel sweat forming on my forehead. One of those questions, I intended to leave so two were left. I had struggled with one of them for long. Harsh had already finished and was checking his paper.

I was on the edge of panic. Thoughts of failing the sickening subject were invading my mind. Concentration was fading and confidence ebbing away. I took a deep breath and checked my watch just 20 minutes left.

"Priya, you are missing one step." Harsh hissed from behind. "Here lean back a bit and see mine."
"Oh." One glance told me where I was going wrong and I scribbled furiously.

One to go and the 10 minute bell rang. My hand was aching, I was making mistakes, 'a' looked like 9 and 'b' looked like 6. Shaun had already reached where I was. Without waiting for me to finish the last question, he started copying from Harsh and murmuring the solution. He practically dictated the solution to Nili and me.

Almost at the last step, 3 minutes left ...

(to be continued)